The snow is melting…the road to UVA Medical Center is active again

Latest entry from Rev. T. Wade Clegg III

The biggest snow of record has melted in Charlottesville, and although extremely cold, activities are now at an increased pace.

The night the snow started falling caught so many off guard along the two lane Jefferson Parkway Highway (Highway 53) in front of Monticello, within hours the highway was shut down from so many cars off the side of the road, and eliminating passing. This was an indicator that anyone being dismissed as a patient from UVA Medical Center from a distance would be in for a surprise.

Fortunately only two people were stranded with no funds to take them through the three days they had to remain in Charlottesville. Both were from West Virginia, and the Hospitality House (HH) was full. There was simply no going over the mountain in a normal vehicle to reach West Virginia. They were extremely appreciative to know that someone was waiting to assist.

Today is January 6 as I write this update. As of the first five days of January, 14 patients and/or family members will be staying in lodging (hospitality house and commercial hotels) for a total of 17 nights. That’s 17 rooms booked in only 5 days. That’s a fast start and considerable expense in just under a week.

As you may know, when I tell little stories of specific situations concerning patients and/or families coming to UVA Medical Center, no names are mentioned. Also, sometimes the distance or place of residence will not be mentioned so as not to touch onto privacy. But – it does assist to let you know again and again the necessity for this charity and the service performed.

Very recently, a patient from no less than 100 miles away, needed to be here for a surgical procedure, not just a routine procedure, but a critical need. The patient has several children, and no supportive partner, just another adult to assist during these trying times. The Hospitality House (HH) can not accommodate the patient who needed the children nearby.

Without a place to stay the day before the procedure, the patient told the social worker that a cancellation was necessary, since funds for lodging were not available. There would not be enough money to feed the kids. They had to be with the patient.

The social worker called and said, “I know it’s late (about 5:30 PM) but this is the situation and this patient needs to have this surgery on schedule tomorrow. Can you help?”

The answer is always YES. Three days in a commercial hotel for the children and adult as they stayed close to the patient, but were able to return to a hotel room each night.

What a difference WE (you and you and us) are all making by securing these rooms, whether in HH or a commercial hotel. The four commercial hotels are five times higher than HH, but we are still afforded the best rates in the community. But as you begin to crunch the numbers, 17 rooms in 6 days is pointing to an expensive month.

Don’t forget about us. Whatever is possible will keep us saying YES when a social worker calls.
Remember – once a social worker calls, the need is now and the person(s) have been screened and the need is absolute. Also - the co-pay fund for indigent clients was fortified again two weeks ago with an additional $200 for the fund to meet needs.

Another reminder! So Important!

In closing, please know that January 19, 2010…that’s a Tuesday from 9 AM – 9 PM, we have been selected for Charlottesville’s Whole Foods Market 5% Day. Such an opportunity! 5% of the net sales to this charity. We will need volunteers for bagging groceries from 11-2 and 4-7 that day, while the advisory group and those less mobile handle a table with handouts.

At this time, we have only two volunteers for the 11 AM-2 PM shift and two volunteers for the 4-7 PM shift for bagging. We could use from 5-6 people each shift. One volunteer couple is among those we married two years ago and lives in Charlottesville. If more people are available, we might add some volunteers to the grocery staff for bagging from 2-4 PM

I just received a note from another couple who is driving up from Asheville, NC on the 18th to spend all day with us on the 19th to assist. That’s about 375 miles one way. Such consideration is so valued. If you are near and can assist, then please e-mail. Of real importance is to contact any friends in the Charlottesville area, and ask them to save their shopping for January 19, 2010.

The address is Whole Foods Market, 300 Shoppers World Court, Charlottesville, VA 22901.
This address is on Highway 29 North (also known as Seminole Trail). Anyone lost in the area that day in route to shop or assist, we will have our cell phones handy at (434) 825-0881 and (434) 825-0556. Cell phones are activated when we are away from home. Remember – Whole Foods has a marvelous deli, one of the best places to dine in town, so come on over and enjoy the visit. Thanks so much for whatever is possible, even if just an e-mail to a friend to SHOP, SHOP, SHOP!

Blessings…T. Wade

If I Had Known Then, What I Know Now … Would I Do It Again?

It’s 10:30 pm…the phone rings, and, the Social Worker on duty at UVA Medical Center is asking if we can help a father with his two little girls with lodging for two or three nights.

• The Case: His wife was transported from a distance of four and half hours to UVA Medical Center for emergency surgery. Because of the children he cannot stay at the UVA Hospitality House. And, he doesn’t have the money for a hotel room. The few dollars he had went for the gasoline in order to drive to Charlottesville. He was also not able to find a babysitter so he had to bring the girls. He does not speak English, and is part-time employed at $8.00/hour.

The process works like this. I call one of the four hotels which is working with us to see who has a room available. I realize that it is going to be hard to place since there is a major concert event in town, and most hotels are booked beyond capacity. I pour another cup of coffee and begin to make the necessary calls. On my third attempt I am able to obtain a room for two nights with the instructions to call back in two days as a third night might be a possibility.

Then I call the social worker back to give her the confirmation number for the hotel. The next couple of hours are occupied with checking bank accounts, paying outstanding hotel bills, going through numerous emails to find out who made a donation, making notes for the next morning to write grant proposals, while uttering at the same time, “We need more money!” In October and November alone, the requests for help were up approximately 200%.

As I refill my cup of coffee again, I thought about that day in October 2008 when we made the decision to form Interfaith Humanitarian Sanctum (IHS) in order to help those people whom we classified as having “unmet needs.” Those unmet needs are well described on our website (http://www.interfaithhumanitariansanctum.org).

I remember sitting with Wade and Sam discussing how we cannot let those people, and some of them with children, continue to sleep in the lobby of the hospital or in the garage if they even have a car. They are not homeless people. These are people caught up in the injustice of the American financial and medical systems. They could not predict in advance that either they, themselves, or their loved one, would end up in a critical situation in the hospital from either and accident or illness.

We are speaking of those individuals who reside more than 60 miles or more from UVA Medical Center. Most are from two to three hundred miles from Charlottesville, Virginia. How hard can it be to form a charity? How hard can it be to give people the evidence that help is needed so the money can just “fly in?”

So we formed this 501 (3)(c) non-religious, nonprofit public charity with no paid staff and ready to respond 24/7 with four telephone contact numbers available day or night to reach us.

After seven months and many thousands of dollars for attorney, accountant, IRS, filing fees, etc., we finally received IRS approval. The last eight months have been trying. The money is NOT “flying in,” but rather traveling by “slow boat.” We are grateful that we have managed so far to respond to every request for help.

The small base of donors who have so graciously signed on with monthly donations, as well as the contributions from friends and family, and with the help of our own personal monies included, we have managed to accomplish the impossible.

It’s now early in the morning. The bills are paid. I am tired and have a slight headache, and I’m asking myself if I had known then what I know now, how hard it is and how hard it was, to do this necessary work, would I do it again?

Just then the phone rings again, and the social worker is on with another request. A cancer out-patient is being dropped off on Saturday for a Monday appointment. The patient’s ride to Charlottesville must return home and come back after the weekend for the patient. Unless an arrangement for a room can be secured, the patient will have no place to stay.

Thank goodness; it’s after the concert and rooms are most probably available.

After securing the room and calling the social worker back with a reservation number, she says, “Thank you so much for helping. The patient could not have come to UVA for the treatment without your help. God bless you!”

Well, there was my answer! Would I do it again? YOU BETCHA … YES YES YES!!! … now I have another cup of coffee.

Blessings…Rev. Elisheva Clegg

When a social worker says “very sick”…it’s critical!

Oct 30 The social worker said, “The wife of a very sick fellow in neuro-intensive has been in hospitality house (HH) for a few days, and simply can’t afford the fee for the extra days. She feels she needs to be near her husband. With his condition, it would really be a relief if she could remain for the week, perhaps six days. She’s about 150 miles from home. Can you assist?”

I suppose one could review this situation and without further info, consider suggesting a return home and return later, but quite literally a round trip home one time by car would entail a gas cost of about $40. When there is room in the hospitality house, that’s four(4) nights to stay and monitor a loved one. It’s a no-brainer to stay if $40 is available to assist.

In addition, one needs to know some of every back story to realize why running back and forth simply is not affordable in so many cases. For one thing, the patient in this case is “very sick.” He is now without work while being treated in intensive care at the hospital. He is the only person employed in the family. This is not a family with savings to run home and back. Indeed, it has been clarified that the wife has already reached her limits for staying in a $10 per night room. Perhaps she needs that amount daily just to eat. The balancing act can be extremely stressful on a family member whose other half is fighting for life just across the street.

If the hospitality house had been filled, and no available beds for the next few days, then this same situation would necessarily be limited to placement in a commercial hotel room for about $50 per night, and that stay would have to be limited to about 2-4 days. As you can readily see, the situation for funding becomes critical when space at HH is simply not available.

Families in such stress do have to make a plan with other family members or friends in these situations, especially if the patient remains for an extended time. But, as we have experienced, sometimes there is no one else to assist, while the waiting becomes excruciating. IHS is providing that extra measure of relief and a treasured measure of time.

When you’ve read the “vision” statement on the website, you will understand why the idea of a large farm house to be able to provide some extra flexibility and access to a kitchen with nutritious meals has to remain an active goal. A house with six rooms initially, then fifteen, then who knows. But consider that HH only has 31 rooms. Fifteen more rooms at a location which can expand would provide for an increase in space of fifty percent. That’s a huge increase. Next year we will pursue ideas of how to realize that goal…but for now we are using every penny to secure nightly sleeping arrangements as requested by the UVA Social Worker staff.

This holiday season please squeeze us on your gift list … and then think of us monthly. October has been the busiest month for needing our assistance. The winter months are the tough ones. We could really use your contribution. Allow us to remove some of the stress so that another family member can bring comfort and security when it is needed the most.

Blessings…T. Wade and Elisheva

Treasured Moments

Sometimes I just stop and say thanks for a treasured moment..this happened again this week.

The social worker called from the UVA Cancer Center and said I have a young woman from northern Virginia who needs to be kept over until Monday for another diagnosis. She’s here alone; she can remain. Her ride must return home. Can you help with these five days for her fee at hospitality house? I said yes. Does she have food money? The answer: She has $3.00 total.

On Thursday we sent a note to Dr. Weber at the Cancer Center for advice on what to buy in frozen dinners for a patient in order to maintain a proper diet to do no harm. I am aware of ingredients, since cancer has more than touched this family. He e-mailed back with a note that the Cancer Center Dietitian would relate information. The response came quickly and off I went to buy 40 dinners (Lean Cuisine, Healthy Choice, etc.) for delivery to HH to supplement their can food and mixes (non-perishables) which are provided through food drives.

Those forty dinners will provide an opportunity for easily prepared hot meals for this particular patient and a few more patients at Hospitality House without funds over the next few days. That's 40 meals, an hour to shop, an hour to ice them down for travel and delivery to town… and the task was secured.

I was delighted with the kind note from Dr. Michael Weber and follow-up from Dietitian Carole Havrila; but, there was another person in the mix today who made me stop and take a breath.

While checking out at the local food market, the young man bagging the frozen dinners said, “Wow, you must really love those pot pies and dinners.” I smiled and said, “They are for a charity in town.” The young man stopped for a moment, reached into his pocket and handed me five dollars and asked me to buy a few dinners from him.

This kid, I learned is working two jobs, and going to school and just handed me enough money to buy a few more meals. It was such an easy, lovely reaction. It was also unsolicited and unexpected. I waited to feel the emotion once outside.

Winter is coming. The increase in lodging requests is rising. Many of those stayovers are waiting for a doctor to see them in the Cancer Center. Many will not have funds for a hot meal. This holiday season try to initiate a habit of just a few dollars for this very intimate and effective direct and immediate assistance program. Your generosity is needed. Your check, even the smallest, is tax deductible.

Blessings…Rev. Elisheva

Whole Foods is supporting IHS during October 2009

This month without knowing when the start time would be, Whole Foods Market, 300 Shoppers World Court, Charlottesville, VA 22901, placed us on their list of supportive charities, and for the whole month your visits to Whole Foods can benefit this charity. Therefore, please allow me to explain: When a customer brings with them their reusable bags, you receive a nickel back BUT YOU HAVE AN OPTION. You can take that nickel off your bill, or receive a wooden nickel and give it to a non-profit featured in the store. There is a box located in the front of the store to hold these wooden nickels and they can really add up. Interfaith Humanitarian Sanctum signed up for the program, but we did not know how quickly we would be on the list.

This is just another way to develop funds for hotel rooms especially. October is turning into a very active time for lodging. As of October 20 (just twenty days) we have reserved during the month no less than forty-six (46 nights) in commercial hotels or hospitality house. 31 nights in hospitality house and 15 in commercial hotels. The month still has 10 days remaining.

Never has a wooden nickel meant so much for so many. Get your reusable bags and go shop at Whole Foods Market, and take your refund in wooden nickels for our box in the front of the store..

Children with Families in Turmoil

The social worker on the phone said, “I have a situation which needs your attention. I’m not sure anyone else can make a difference.” My response, “Let’s talk.”

This social worker is a no nonsense, excellent judge of situations which can evolve into more drastic circumstances. As a social worker in the critical care arena at UVA Medical Center, she understands the tense situations which can arise. This was one of those situations.

She said that there had been a physical confrontation between members of a family in a patient’s room. The wife of the patient just had a shoving match in the patient’s room with the patient’s Mother and Father. The atmosphere was really tense, and if necessary security can be summoned to control and settle the matter.

She went on to indicate, in conjunction with the hall nurse, that the worrisome part of the family confrontation is that the wife has no place to stay and she has a four year old boy who is witnessing all of this dispute, and also worrying about his Dad. It was a setting which was giving everyone real concern, yet the Mother and child have no place to get away for quiet time and allow the child to be removed from the environment with his grandparents.

“Can you help?” she asked.

I immediately obtained a room for the Mother and the boy for that evening. The Mother was told that this opportunity was to give her time to take the boy and relax and remove themselves from the conflict of the moment.

This was one of those unexpected situations for which there is generally no simple answer or most certainly no opportunity available for temporary relief of such a stressful situation. Fortunately, a very alert social worker allowed her concerns to reach out to us as a potential helping hand, but especially for the sake of a child hearing arguments in the presence of a family in turmoil and a father in critical condition.

The flexibility to offer relief for the child was a no brainer, and because of the charity’s flexibility to assist even temporarily, I am told that the Mother was able to plan what was best for the present dilemma.

The ability to project lodging even for a temporary overnight situation can be the result of so many scenarios. This particular situation called for a social worker to think outside the box and reach out for a chance for a child to be removed from harmful family exchanges which could escalate and leave such negative memories, especially with a parent at death’s door.

Interfaith Humanitarian Sanctum is that opportunity for UVA Medical Center social workers to explore as a chance to assist patients and families when no other opportunity exists. Contributions, even in the smallest amounts, allow for maintaining a vital route for assistance for just such moments. Moments that matter!

Your tax deductible contribution will allow for a continuation of this vitally flexible public charity, dedicated to serving UVA Medical Center patients and families who travel over great distances, too often without adequate funds to balance for lodging, food, transportation and even co-pay assistance. Although our intent is to fill specific unmet needs for temporary assistance for this group of visitors to Charlottsville, we have allowed for some flexibility to reach out as funds allow, and assist others who are seeking to serve these same people. Sometimes there are gaps which exist when no other charitable or hospital entity can assist with immediacy, based on their procedural restraints, monetary limitations, and lack of space regarding lodging. IHS is only restrained when funds are limited. That is why your contributions are so very important, even if as little as $10-20 monthly.

Thank you for listening.

Blessings…

Rev. Elisheva Clegg
Chaplain Volunteer & Founding Member, Interfaith Humanitarian Sanctum

A public Charity, independent of, serving UVA Medical Center

What Did I Say That Made a 7-year old Boy Squeeze ....

What did I say that made a 7-year old boy squeeze my leg with such delight and say ”thank you,” as if he had just received a Christmas present?

What I said was, “Tonight you will be sleeping in a hotel room in town.” Why did it make such a difference to a small boy? Because he had been sleeping in the UVA Medical Center garage in the car with his Mother and 8 month old sibling. For three days!

No single incident in my experience as a volunteer overnight Chaplain at the UVA Medical Center brings home the absolute sense of contributing to the well-being of a family than the opportunity to assist this struggling family.

On that night I had exchanged words with a young woman in the elevator who inquired about entry into the garage and directions after hours. I had offered some information, and she continued on her way. Little did I know that my next summons within minutes by beeper would bring me into closer contact with this same young woman within the hour.

The beeper call from the overnight social worker requested that I come to her location. The social worker had actually tried to reach me at home around midnight, only to be told that I was the overnight Chaplain on duty, and could be reached personally in the medical center. The social worker was very happy that I was so near, for she was very anxious to speak with someone to assist her.

Upon arrival, the social worker told me about a mother with children staying in a car, and that she had just learned of the situation. The young mother had rushed to be with her husband who had been air lifted into the hospital. The patient had been without work for over a year, finally found a construction job, and on the first day had slipped off a roof and broken both hips. His wife had hurried from hundreds of miles away to be near him and with no one to immediately assist with the children simply placed them in the car and came running.

The wife had anticipated having enough money for eating, a few days in a motel, travel, etc, but the funds simply were insufficient. Hotel rooms were beyond her expectation, and she decided to make the best by having snacks and baby items in the car, so she could be near until some decisions could be made. There was no immediate family to assist. The Hospitality House with its $10/per night rate for families was not available to her since there is a restriction which does not allow children.

When the young woman was summoned, I greeted her with her baby and the little boy, and indicated that she and the children would be staying in the Holiday Inn University in town tonight, and perhaps extra nights, in order for her to refresh and collect her thoughts for a plan to return home and seek assistance for the children. This way she could return and stay in the Hospitality House without limitations.

This was when the small boy grabbed my leg, holding onto me and expressing a smiling “thank you.” This was a time when one’s composure is tested. There is a need to touch and squeeze and reciprocate, which I did; but there is also a sense of wanting to openly weep that this family, as with many, who endure such hardship on top of such stress, and silently experience the sense of nowhere to turn.

I have seen many families over the last three years, while serving in the Chaplaincy program, who rush to Charlottesville to be near a critically injured or ill family member. They are desperate to be near their loved one, often neglecting to make a plan, and far too often without adequate funds to balance their lodging, eating and travel expenses.

The social workers at UVA Medical Center continue to have my deepest admiration. They are sensitive to such situations, and sometimes only through their inquiry do they discover the tragic situations whereby families will neglect themselves and sleep in cars, waiting rooms, and literally exist on soda and crackers. It happens frequently…and this night made our role as a charity, independent of the Medical Center which can react quickly and efficiently to ease this family’s plight, such a significant contributor.

Generally, a social worker will call me at home and indicate that the UVA Hospitality House has full occupancy, or a family member with a child has arrived and they barely have enough to eat, and most certainly no lodging money. Of course the one restriction which seems to be most prominent with on-going concern is the fact that children under 18 are not allowed to stay in the Hospitality House. This is generally not a matter explored by a family member who is terrified for a loved one in ER or Critical Care. The urgency to simply get to Charlottesville is overwhelming. This person who may die is their Dad, Mom, child or closest friend.

The reality is that the UVA Hospitality House has no plans to expand; nor does the Ronald McDonald House, which assists families who have a child in the Medical Center as patients. The limitations will continue to be evident, and the need for a Interfaith Humanitarian Sanctum ( a public, non-religious, no stock, nonprofit charity with no paid staff) to BE that extra safety net. There is no other net at this time to catch these children who have come along for a very desperate ride.

Therefore, when we say that your tax deductible contribution of $5, $10, $20 or more monthly as a consistent contribution can make a difference…that’s an understatement. We have three generous hotels who allow a $50 per night rate, and presently only about 25 people are contributing to keep the rooms, food as needed, and travel and co-pay assistance available.

The three people, who are this charity, devote full time to securing the funds, working the phones, expanding opportunities, and using our personal income to make this opportunity happen. The numbers who come to Charlottesville with the needs expressed in this short article are growing and there is no reason to believe it will cease.

Consider what you can do. We promise that no one who shows up in Charlottesville in need of temporary lodging, food, travel with a loved one in the Medical Center, or a patient who needs a cancer diagnosis and can not come here for a 1-2 day stay because he or she can not afford lodging, will be left without assistance. That promise can be met and sustained with your participation.

We have a very real request: Please never allow me to look at another child and not be able to place him or her in a safe place for the night, and know that he or she is well nourished. This is generally only a temporary fix, but when it happens it is not a matter of discussion; it is urgent. I can not take these lovely faces home. I need to be able to continue to provide for these desperate times, which are frequent.

The holidays are coming; make a pledge with your children of $5 or more for each month. $5 X 12 months = $60. That’s one night in a hotel for a family and food. It only takes a few giving families with similar contributions to allow that necessary stay over of a few days for these families in need.

The stress for these visitors to our community is often unbearable. Too often their worst nightmares come true, as they plan for a life with more challenges than they have ever known. While they are here, their well-being is in OUR hands. ME AND YOU…WE ARE THE KEEPERS.

The people at UVA Hospitality House and Ronald McDonald House are the keepers also. This new charity has been established to meet the overflow when the established entities simply can not provide. These original providers have a limited number of rooms, a very real situation. Who will assist with the unmet needs? This was our question, and the answer is our charity.

Right now, I am seeking assistance for the immediate matters at hand; but our vision for the future must encompass an ability to provide a comfort zone with active involvement for those who come with inadequate funds to balance for lodging, food, travel, etc…and then learn that the closest person in their world is never coming home. This is the juncture when so much more is needed than a hotel room and meals. Much more.

Please read the Vision statement in our website (http://www.interfaithhumanitariansanctum.org/vision.php) and it will be clear that we are looking ahead to establish a real place to meet real needs. Thank you for listening.

Blessings…Chaplain Elisheva